Saturday, December 24, 2011

An apology to my doppelganger*.

Christmas with Shorter Half’s family took place today. The adult siblings draw names for a gift exchange, SH’s mother buys for everyone, the cousins get to squirrel around, we graze on food that is generally verboten the rest of the year, and those of legal age drink Mimosas. Everyone is encouraged to keep their Amazon gift list up-to- date to simply things, and the sequence of events is fairly predictable.

This year the first round of gifts was handed out, and I had from my mother-in-law what clearly looked like a CD. I was intrigued as there were no CDs on my list, but it turned out to be the new one from Coldplay. She asked what I thought. I said I’d probably really enjoy it. We both looked puzzled.

The second round of gifts was making the circuit, and SH’s little sister was bouncing up and down on the sofa telling me how much she loved the gift I was about to open. It was a set of measuring cups shaped like a set of nested matryoshka dolls. My mother-in-law said something about them being from my Amazon list. I said I’d never seen either the CD or the measuring cups before in my life.

Yes. My Christmas presents came off the list of another Nancy R., which we all found hilarious. And then it occurred to me that this other Nancy R. might actually be monitoring her list and wondering why nobody ever gave her the CD or the measuring cups or the Harry Potter movie that had been purchased.  And so I offer my humble apologies to the other Nancy R. I’m sorry if you’re feeling shortchanged. But I’m also really, really glad that my MIL didn’t find the Nancy R. that wanted the 3 lbs. of diatomaceous earth and the bedbug-proof pillowcases.

* It was pointed out to me that it was much more likely that I was the doppelganger.


  1. Three pounds of dirt- now THAT'S a present!
    Funny stuff...
    Merry Christmas to you & your clan.

  2. My wife had that set of those measuring cups on here list they seem to be a popular gift Amazon sold out of them, I had to order a set from a different retailer.

  3. @ doubletrouble,

    Um, the diatomaceous earth aquarium filters are pretty nifty. Or, if it is food grade, makes a startlingly effective, non-drug dose for removing intestinal parasites in livestock and pets.

    Diatomaceous earth isn't related to potting soil. Think of it as micro-sized crushed glass, the exoskeletons of diatoms, very small ocean life.

    @ Nancy R.,

    Viva la Vida by Coldplay is a pretty good tune. It seems to be the story of one of the European kings that lost the second Crusade and fell into slavery. Coldplay does a very nice presentation in the YouTube video. Well, maybe just a bit strange.

    Enjoy the season. May all your hopes for the new year come true. May all your disappointments in the next year be minor.

    Blessed be!